Recently there was a conversation in a local facebook group that I help run about legitimate work-from-home jobs for moms. Many moms felt that it was impossible to actually get work done with kids at home, and that you still need some form of child care to be successful.
“No way!” I chimed in. I mean, I’ve been at it for years now, even answering work emails while in labor. Aside from the fact that my living room is never clean and my kitchen is a literal nightmare, I still manage to get my work done mostly on time. I’m a Modern American Woman! I can be effective! I can do it all!
Life is funny sometimes.
I should know better by now. Whenever I’m feeling like things are going well, I’m getting things done, everything’s coming up Milhouse, life loves to knock me down a peg or two.
Sure, I’ve been doing this for years. I’m a pro at being able to work on a project despite multiple distractions, and having to stop and start over and over again. I make it work. I get it done. But at some point you just get run down.
At least once a week I send my husband a text: “I can’t do this anymore.” I did it yesterday, actually.
(Upon further examination, I should probably be a little less vague in that respect because he probably thinks I’m getting ready to leave him every week.)
But today? Today had me in actual tears. I’m already in full exhaustion mode from working well into the early morning hours every night so maybe I’m already a little emotional anyway. I thought that maybe I could get the bulk of my work done this afternoon so that I can go to sleep early tonight. I got all the kids situated with their choice of entertainment and sat down at the kitchen table to work.
My daughter, who was right behind me, found a better form of entertainment.
It’s only the bazillionth time she’s done this, and I’m just glad it wasn’t the foundation this time. I stopped what I was working on and took her into the bathroom to clean her up. Oh, and her hair is wet because I literally JUST gave her a bath. Of course.
While I was getting her all cleaned up, someone else decided to do a little grooming too.
Nevermind that we just spent $16 plus a generous tip at the “big boy barbershop” to get him the haircut that he asked for. I don’t even care about the money, or the hair. It will grow back. But I’m tired, and I’m being swallowed up by deadlines. And I just want to take a nap.
I watch my kids, I really do. I move my laptop around the house so I can be in whatever room they’re in. I take frequent breaks to play, too! But this set up isn’t working for me anymore. Preschool can’t start soon enough.
To the work-at-home-moms that I scoffed at yesterday: I’m sorry, you were right.